|Posted on January 9, 2013 at 5:10 PM|
When I graduated, I took on three part time jobs, one full time, the other two ten to twenty hours a week. I was a new counselor and very idealistic, I wanted to keep up high standards. What a shock I was in for.
On one job they did mostly family counseling. Yes, I needed some additional theory beyond what I had received. That would of been wonderful, interesting, and productive. But to teach me they had me sit in with a master level counselor, which in itself would of been ok, but he was not well trained and eventually gave up the profession. I learned what he had to give and analyzed the dynamics of some of the males wanting and having a 'Golden Boy,' and he was not their only one. The theory of these men was that males have more dynamics then women, that only a man can teach it to boys, and only men can really understand it. The golden boy displays this talent without training or experience. Their golden boy eventually couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag. But the next golden boy they had only had a bachelors, the 'natural counselor,' they called him, 'wonder boy.' He too gave up the profession, I think because he, like the other, could not meet their unrealistic expectations.
This may make you very skeptical that I would be saying such bold things and was so new at the business. At the time I was in the dark, but with more and more time and work behind me it became more clear. Some people need saviors, someone that can justify their doubts about themselves or their craft and prove that the miraculous can happen. I think it happens mostly with people that are not well enough educated to figure out what they are doing, we never really can, but they are even more in the dark. They are competitive but unable to compete because of education and experience, but if they possess a miracle, a natural talent, they can compete without the sweat of time and education. But they can not last if they are truly not golden. I have yet to see anyone golden.
I would always be suspect to these men because I was female and had more education. They wanted to justify paying me less and not allowing me to advance. They had a psychiatrist challenge me in one of the meetings, but when he confronted me about being emotionless, a myth the guys had spread, and tears came to my eyes and I answered him the best I could the political games ended. I was then on the accepted list as a good therapist and the golden boy age, of a couple of years, went away.
I had told a young man at one of my other jobs, a job ran by a woman, that his ambitions and male structuring and stances were not working because it was not a male system. I told him about the other job and said he should apply there. Not only did he join us in the other job he went up the ladder quickly to clinical director and from then on I was protected from anymore politics. He knew I was his equal and at times more.
This job, of the three jobs, was the healthiest and most stable. But all organizations go through cycles of start, success, and demise. Demise would come, but not yet. When it did it was a real eye opener, unexpected. Next I will tell you how the egos of ambitious men can destroy even the best of agencies.