Psychotoons

To help adults and children understand psychology.

Forums

Post Reply
Forum Home > A-Z Psychology > Trust, truth, temptation

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

When it comes to the issue of trust, some say trust has to be earned. Others say that trust is freely given. I say that it is both. You give someone your trust but when they violate that trust, then they have to earn it back but it will always be guarded. That is the truth.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

July 12, 2012 at 1:22 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

 

 

Are you talking of your trust of them or their trust of you?. We so easily see why we do or do not do things but it is hard for us to see why others do or do not. We sometimes have to trust that their trust is not being broken but that our perceptions of their trust is also at question. Once we are gods we will not have such problems, but until then we always have to take into consideration that our perceptions are not perfect. So we do not play god and forget the plank in our own eye.

 

Trust is a two way street. We have to trust and we have to be trustworthy. If we are not trustworthy but expect them to be then we are asking them to grovel and do things we are unwilling to do. If they do not grovel the way we feel they should and then we spring at them, we then become hypocrites and as such who are we to demand others are perfect?

 

We have to be humble and see each others pressures in life and not feel that only our own suffering at their expense is worthy and their suffering from our folly is not legitimate. All people do what they think is right for the time and the moment, if they do not do what works it is only ignorance. To think otherwise is to make others villains and ourselves the only worthy people. And as such we become judge, jury, and executioners. We can not even trust our own motives and perceptions totally. Always be guarded of others and self and remember truth is always allusive to human eyes. 



July 13, 2012 at 11:30 AM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

You make a lot of sense. Your villian It kind of reminds me of this old saying"Everybody is strange but me and thee, but thee is a little strange." Everybody has faults. it is trying to remember that about yourself when in a negative situation. Our perceptions are about ourselves most of the time. It takes time to learn. a lifetime of experience.

Talking about time. Have you ever noticed that we never have the time to do the things we really want to do? We want to write, we want to create, we want to do something new but never find the time to do it. It is frustrating. but life happens and other things take priority.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

July 16, 2012 at 11:50 AM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

 

 

I think the secret to doing the things you want to do is to not wait for the ideal time but to begin anytime. You say you want to write. Tonight when you go to bed take a pen and paper, a journal if you have one, and start to write. "Dear Journal, I want to be a writer and I have not the slightest idea how to do that, but I see and hear……., think……, I feel……., I even did……" It does not matter what you write. Writing is like playing with clay. You start out punching the clay, all of a sudden you see an arm, so you go for the body. Soon it looks like something else. If you want to write about on certain subjects you may want to pick up a book or two on that subject and each night incorporate the new ideas you learned from the book. Just BS and enjoy yourself. After awhile it becomes easier and you have a product to change and or to sell or to polish. As you journal each night you should underline the theme of your efforts. Your journel has then become your first would be book. Try rearranging the themes and or adding some. The main thing is to have fun.

 

To be a professional writer is to have the right style for the market you are looking at. So read their styles and reshape your clay to fit the style. There are courses you can take on the internet to learn the secrets of the markets. I know, you may not want to be a writer but want to be something else. The principles still apply. Just start, play with it, express yourself in it, have fun, and keep doing it until you are happy with the results. Rome was not built overnight but over many nights, and no one knew what the final product would look like, it did not matter. Life happens is right, so play with your passions and let them happen. As you get better and better at them they become priority.



July 17, 2012 at 11:19 AM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

Yeah right. You make it sound sooo easy. Just take up the pen and write. By the time I am ready for bed I am exhausted. When I get up  I have things to do. Writing what you want takes thinking and time. Doing things that you want takes time: which always evades us. What if I had all the money in the world, would I have time then?

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

July 18, 2012 at 12:09 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

It is easy to think and write, you make it difficult with your reasons not to think and write what you want. We never stop thinking, we only choose what to think about. And if you have though about what you want to write it only takes a few minutes to try and put it down. All the money in the world will not help if you do not try. Time is a continuous thing, it does not come and go, it is always there. You choose what you do with it. And with modern technology you can even dictate to your computer and it will do the typing for you. The more you try to channel your time and thoughts to your passions the more energy you will have for it. Like everything else practice makes better not bitter.


Perhaps your problem is not time and energy but that you are in the habit of excuses and finding reason why you 'can not' instead of 'can.' Who taught you that? Who taught you to stop dreaming? Who taught you to give up?

July 18, 2012 at 12:25 PM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

Your right again...It is easier to make excuses than it is to take the time to do what you know you should do. You are a good teacher.

This is a time of Transition. There are alot of people I know who are going through change.

Some people I know are moving out of the state they have lived in all their lives. Their friends and loved ones are feeling the pains of change. It feels like they are losing a friend. Even though they are just moving a state or two away. It still hurts.

Some people I know have had jobs all their lives and have become "homeless" living in their cars or sleeping on their friends couches.

Change is never easy. I wonder if the butterfly feels pain when she is transformed into what she must become?

The best book I have read on change is "Who moved my cheese?" It is an allegory to how things change over time, how to recognize when it is beginning to occur and what to do when change happens. I recommend reading it!

Sometimes transition can be scary because you do not know what the future holds. All I can tell my friends and loved ones is Hold to God's unchanging hand. He has it all in control. God cares about what happens to you. Remember We are his people and the sheep of his hand.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

August 16, 2012 at 8:03 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

I am going to repeat what I wrote to Realsisters2 in the forum Personal Growth

It is a grieving process, any change triggers this process, just as if someone we know has passed away we have to rewrite the brain from including them to going on without their help, support, or burden. Think of the brain as a switch board or computer, you have to disconnect from the program of the past and make new connections for the future programs. In the transition the brain is not sure what is going on and so is floating out in space.

 

Dreaming is so important to begin to rewrite the future. It gives the brain pleasure and hope. Just relax with the unpleasant anxiety that goes with the change. The brain is using anxiety to make you hyper vigulant so you do not miss the details needed for a successful transition. It inflicts fear to make sure you are careful. Show the brain with your positive thoughts that all is well. It is almost robotic, mechanical, reflexive. Dream on dreamer and enjoy thinking what the future could look like.

Religion also calms the mind and the body. It helps people relax and prayer helps people dream for the best and look at decision with hope and faith. Where Is My Cheese also makes the statement that we get use to things and think it will never change, and we feel we own the circumstances we were blessed with for a while.


August 16, 2012 at 10:16 PM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

TENSION:
Sometimes, when you are around people, the atmosphere feels tense. It is like conflict or arguements or other emotions that are under the surface are wanting  to erupt-kind of like a valcano. The Tension in the air is sometimes so thick that if feels as heavy and as though you could cut it with a knife. it is like you must really fight to maintain your own peace of mind. If you don't you will be sucked into the undertow and /or erupt in anger or a show of frustration. That is the challenge one must deal with to maintain peace of mind in the midst of chaos.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

August 20, 2012 at 12:33 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

 

You are feeling the Lower Nature. It is hard wired to put you in the defensive and prepare you for the fight. It fills your body with adrenaline and so you get antsy. To stop from being sucked into the fight you have to talk to yourself to stop and listen but not to take it personally. Nurturing the other, even though they are out of control, helps you be calm. The nervous system can not be loving and aggressive at the same time. So you listen for the hurt and pain in their yelling and then feel for them, feel their pain and react with comfort to them. If nothing works to stop them just listen and let them vent. But listen for the reasons they feel they are in pain.

 

If you are really patient you may listen for a long long time until they have vented all and calmed down. Usually only takes a few minutes, but can go up to hours. No one can go on for ever, only seems like that at the moment. There is always patterns in chaos. Look for them and things will start making sense. Any questions?


August 21, 2012 at 12:39 PM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

What do you mean by patterns in chaos? Give me an example of what you mean. To me chaos is something out of the norm. Does it really have a pattern?

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

August 22, 2012 at 5:00 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

Chaos is the word we use when we can not see the pattern. But it does not mean there is no pattern. We will feel someone is babbling or just chattering nonsense. But when we really listen we will hear themes that reflect their fears. Even the chaos of falling water, moving clouds, or a rushing river have patterns. When one studies the flood of starts they find patterns. Perhaps there is nothing without pattern. Name something you think may not have pattern and tell me what you find.

August 23, 2012 at 1:25 AM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

Paying TAXES seems like CHAOS! In any case it seems unfair to have to pay so much!

I know we live in the best country in the world and are supposed to pay our fair share....but give me a break!

The IRS is independent of the federal government and can do as they see fit. I owe, I owe so off to work for them I go.

Happy TAX day everybody. Smile while you pay your fair share...even if you have to grit your teeth while you do it.

Now off  to support the post office I go.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

April 15, 2013 at 11:41 AM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

You are funny. I too think IRS should be ran by the government, profit organizations can cost a lot more so they can make a profit, also profit organizations are not a service to us but first to their organization and themselves. Why should we assume any corporation has the best in mind for the public, now we can not longer negotiate without an expensive lawyer and so how do the poor have any power to demand rights and fairness, the government was our interceder, or at least we so thought since we voted some of the leader into office. We have no power over IRS, we must take them with trust that they know the truth and that they resist temptation. But, really, so we did with the government. Perhaps there is little difference, but I like to believe the government is of the people, by the people, and for the people. 

April 15, 2013 at 10:13 PM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

Government for the people? Dream on my friend. Government and the law is for the punishment of sinners. I guess the IRS believe we all are sinners and are making us pay. But again we do live in the greatest country in the world...to make a profit.

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

April 17, 2013 at 12:49 AM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

Government is your only hope to regulate the crime others do. Without government you have war lords that kill tons of people. When your house is on fire you call the fire department, when your car is stolen you call the police. Yes, you will not get the perfect result you want but without them what could you possibly do? Yes there are pot holes in the road, but the roads are not muddy ruts that go no where. Yes there is crap in our food, way too much, but it could and would be worse. It all boils down to concentration of people, the more people in a small area the more crooks are concentrated too, and so you have to have concentrated civil servants to deal with them.

 

We are all sinners, but some do a lot more and crime can be organized. We need to be organized to protect ourselves from them. It is called Government. But we have to participate in government or it simply does not exist, or crooks take up government jobs. Yes, one has to be educated or spend a lot of time on how to do that, so lets get educated and start trying. Then it is Government BY the people.

April 19, 2013 at 10:53 AM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

That is why we pay our far share. Time: why does time go so fast the older we get?

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

April 26, 2013 at 12:36 AM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

Our sense of time is a perception, as such it is influenced by our memory and thinking. Children do not think deeply and time to them seems to go very slow, they have always lived and never die. But as we get older we not only have lots of memories to view very quickly, and so it seems time went fast, but we see the beginning and the end. Now we have apprehension that time is running out. You could also say boredom makes time slow down and the older we are the less bored we are as we have so many rich thoughts and memories to entertain ourselves with and wish we had the time to write them down. Oops, time is going to fast again.

April 26, 2013 at 12:26 PM Flag Quote & Reply

A Joyful Messenger
Member
Posts: 296

If only we had the time to write things down ...I like the book of Ecclesiastes where it talks about time...

Ecc 3:1  To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

Ecc 3:2  A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

Ecc 3:3  A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

Ecc 3:4  A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

Ecc 3:5  A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

Ecc 3:6  A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

Ecc 3:7  A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

Ecc 3:8  A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

 

--

**JOYFUL MESSENGER

April 27, 2013 at 10:30 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Ruth Currah
Site Owner
Posts: 567

Beautiful language, I bet ever more beautiful in the original language.

May 2, 2013 at 9:21 PM Flag Quote & Reply

You must login to post.